On My Own

For the first time in about four years I’m officially on my own, here in Salt Lake City. My husband had to head back home to Casper, WY today to work for a couple of weeks. Now that I’m feeling good, have been cleared to drive, and can pretty much do whatever doesn’t hurt, I’m officially able to be on my own. Talk about a strange feeling! Until a couple weeks ago it had been several years since I had even taken a shower without there being someone home, just in case. It’s amazing how things change when you can breathe.

Really that’s the biggest change, and it affects everything, is my ability to breathe. When your heart doesn’t work right it doesn’t supply enough blood to your lungs causing shortness of breathe when doing even the simplest thing, like brushing your hair.  As I get stronger, I notice that it’s being able to breathe that has had the most impact on my healing. I can exercise, climb stairs, walk through the grocery store, cook dinner, wash my hair, take a shower without a spotter…LOL! My energy level is definitely higher than it was pre-transplant, and I’m able to do more than I could thirteen weeks ago.

It’s a whole new world. Even though this journey started about four years ago it feels like an eternity since I’ve felt a little bit normal. It is odd to be able to envision some kind of normal in the future when not that long ago I didn’t think I had much more than six months, and it was going to be a hard six months. This six months isn’t easy by any means with transplant set-backs, and wanting to move faster than my body will allow, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There’s a future now.

I won’t be alone while my husband is away. My oldest son is coming to visit me, plus I have the friends I’ve made at cardiac rehab I see three times a week. I also have some friends in the area I’d like to visit with now that I’m feeling better.

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